When you’re in a happy relationship, everything just seems to fall into place. Sure, there are setbacks, but you normally make decisions together, discuss any issues freely, and genuinely appreciate each other ‘s presence. Toxic relationships are a different thing. When you’re in one, it’s much more difficult to spot red flags. According to relationship psychotherapist Jor-El Caraballo, if you constantly feel fatigued or sad after spending time with loved ones, it might be an indication that something has to change. Here are some telltale indications of toxicity in a connection, as well as what to do if you notice them on your own.
- Lacking trust in each other
A companion is someone you can rely on, share your vulnerabilities with, and have on your side. Neither of these things is feasible in the lack of trust. Jeni Woodfin, LMFT, a therapist at J. Woodfin Counseling in San Jose, California, says, “When I observe someone in a mainly healthy connection, there is a certainty that they have in the permanence of their connection.” “There would be no sense of comfort without trust, and not just hope that their spouse would be loyal, but believe that their companion will act in the best interests of the relationship’s commitments.”
- Unreliability that persists
Your partner may have been giving you a lot of promises saying that he or she will marry you and they are working on it. However, all you can see is him or her spending most of their time at the casino online in Malaysia with a credit card and don’t plan anything regarding the marriage with you. If you are the only one who puts your 100%, you should reconsider whether this relationship is what you are looking for or not. Mutual dependability is essential for establishing trust and is at the heart of any successful partnership.
- Love bombing
Love bombing is pleasurable until it isn’t. You may believe that the connection has progressed too quickly and that you are under pressure to be “in a romantic relationship” or “close buddies” right away. Love bombing may appear to be a blossoming and thrilling way to kickstart a relationship, however, if your lover or acquaintance is always in contact with you and argues or panics when they can’t reach you, you may be in a destructive relationship.
- Constant belittling
The language that is degrading. Those are harsh statements. Insults. Screaming. Such behaviours are a telltale symptom of a poisonous marriage or relationship. They have really no role in a loving relationship and should never be done around others, and even in public. If a person usually humiliates their lover around other people, particularly other family members, they will be perceived as a laughingstock and someone who should not be trusted. That picture will cause havoc on their sense of security and confidence. “Notice whether your partner frequently says things such as ‘nobody really desires you,’ ‘you should be pleased I’m with you when no one else desires you,’ or ‘you are just so dumb,’” Lewis advises. “You can end yourself believing them, making it difficult to escape this unhealthy relationship.”